The Sleepless Arbor of Rest

Post 296

For a while now I have been mulling over a very big concept attempting to break it down into manageable portions useful to a practical application. The problem is that I still question if I am ready to actually begin to address this topic at the written-conclusion level, yet the time has come that this level of organized thought must occur for the mulling to take shape enough to continue forward. It seems that I am now stuck on a mental “skipping record” that, until I work through on paper, will not let me progress to the next thought. I have delayed further Posting until my mind could be rested enough to apply it to the continuing topic at the degree it requires, and frankly I don’t think that time has yet come. So as almost an isolated short topic thought, I contemplate attempting a burst of work with the intent to quickly resume the needful resting. But I already know that once I begin I will not be able to stop until it is concluded. I really don’t want to begin again yet. Not quite yet, let me rest here a moment longer.

I find it curios that in refreshing my mind with the simple perusal of Pilgrims Progress while I enjoy my rest, I am conveniently warned by discovering that my own journey is at the same “pleasant Arbour” of rest half way up the “Hill of Difficulty” where Christian fell asleep in his rest and lost his grip on the roll (i.e. the Scriptures) p.p. 86-89. This is profound in being reminded that a place to rest is not a place to sleep, yet in the great need of rest sleep creeps on by nature in the resting. In my own rest I am somehow greatly concerned to be vigilant against falling asleep but almost the longer I remain idle to rest the agitating question itself keeps me from sleeping;

“How long is long enough to rest and when should I continue my laborious effort to climb this hill of difficulty?”

My weary mind is very much enjoying this Arbor of pleasant rest but I am assaulted by the knowledge that no progress is made while resting.
One thing seems apparent; I have rested long enough for my mind to be keenly aware that the longer I remain here to rest the looser the roll is gripped, and once lost there is a long backtracking needed to find it again before resuming the journey. John Bunyan describes this truth so simply yet so profoundly! Apparently I have rested long enough because I can hardly fight off the spiritual sleep that is slowly and slyly overtaking me in the state of rest. What a strange apparent anomaly that tells me when the desire to sleep grows overpowering it is time to rise up and move on in the labor, lest I loose my grip on the word of God that the labor itself keeps me alert to hold onto.
As I spool-back-up to continue my ongoing topic of study I wonder if I have not already lost grip and need to retrace my work significantly in order to take up where I left off. I think not; having not fallen asleep in my rest I may have relaxed my grip on the topic but the word of God yet remains firmly grasped. This release of the topic may actually allow God to move me forward in His own plan without my ideas crowding in to drive it where it is not intended to go. I can speculate how I will approach this next section of the hill but what’s the point; my speculations are usually wrong anyway. So let’s just lace up the boots and begin the climb and see how it turns out as the Lord leads. I enjoyed the rest while it lasted and am torn by my desire to stay longer, but the work remains unfinished and it is mine to do.
Let’s be up and away.
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